Hi Friends,
I know. I've been gone. I also know I start every post that way, lately, which sucks. Well, yesterday was my birthday, which is when I tend to make resolutions, so hopefully that will change.
Anyway, I've got a little story for ya, a bit of an ethical situation, perhaps, and as much as I hate to make y'all do work, I'm gonna need you to weigh in.
Here it goes.
Bella and Buster dated, a long time ago. They began their courtship in 2001-ish, dated for several years, lived together for some of those years, and parted as amicably as two people in such a situation can.
During their living-together stint, Buster had a job more consistently than did Bella. Buster paid a lot more than his fair share of the bills and rent until Bella got a job. Buster was great.
Bella would tell him, "Buster, when we are in the situation to do so, I will help you with your old debt to make it up to you."
Bella got a job, and everything started to equal out. Bella started to pay her share, but they didn't hack into Buster's debt yet. Over the duration of their relationship, Bella's mom, who lived in the same city, tried to do little things for them all the time. She bought Buster four new tires when he needed one. She took them on extravagant (albeit, family) trips to Spain, Italy, and Las Vegas (though that was because Bella's mom wanted to see Celine Dion, and she basically forced the fam to do the same, so we can't expect Buster to be too grateful for that. Sorry Celine). She gave Buster a surprise 30th birthday party. She paid for movers for the two lovers when they needed one.
So, unfortunately, the day came when the young couple split up. Nothing dramatic happened, no cheating, lying, or stealing. Just a realization that the two were not well suited to each other.
Years pass. The two see each other occasionally, being that they have mutual friends. While it's not the most comfortable situation on earth, it's not horrible, either.
One day, about four years post break-up (timeline is iffy, bear with me), Buster tells Bella how disappointed he is that she has never helped him with his debt. Bella retorts "why, Buster, we broke up a zillion years ago! Surely it's not still my responsibility to help you with debt accrued before we were even together!"
Buster disagrees. Buster insists. Buster wants money from Bella. Bella brings up all the ways she thinks their relationship evened out, money-wise, in the past, but Buster was not having it. Bella brings up that they both have new lives and this is not how the world works; Buster disagrees.
Bella wonders why Buster has waited so long to bring this up. Bella then finds out that Buster has proposed to his current girlfriend (rings are expensive!).
Debate ensues.
So we ask: does Bella owe Buster money after the fact? Many years after? Tell us. If she does, that's cool, too. Bella can take it.
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5 comments:
I would say no, based on the facts as given and assuming the figures line up, definitely not. The mere fact that this comes four years later is...well, a little too late. The statute of limitations has run out, in my opinion.
i agree with that assessment, tep...(you know...in case it wasn't obvious by the post itself)
If this was debt that he incurred from helping her out, which is how I first read it, I'd say that she should pay him back. And even then I'd think the statute on that is like a year, maybe. (I may be saying this because an ex owes me money from many years ago that I know I'll never see but annoys me when I think about it.)
However, if it's just his debt that was there before their relationship then it's his problem alone.
so unless i read it wrong...
the thing is, Buster had this debt BEFORE they started going out, so legally the debt is HIS and not THEIRS. it is his responsibility. If they were still together bella could help all she wants to relieve that debt but since breaking up, its still HIS debt and his to deal with. If he was in so much debt when he proposed to the new thang then he should have proposed or bought a ring.
Buster incurred his debt while supporting Bella. There is much more to this story than Bella is saying. It is a shame that Bella feels the need to broadcast personal information, and then concoct a story that is totally one-sided.
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